A Letter To My Oldest Son on his 10th Birthday

Dear Logan,

10 years. Double figures. A whole decade of Logan! You know when you find out you’re pregnant with your first child, you think about the pregnancy, the nursery, you never think of what having a ten-year-old will be like. Well, let me tell you it’s pretty awesome… well, most days. You’re the child that made me a Mum, changed me in ways I never expected, the child at one point I wasn’t sure I could have and I am so, so grateful to have you in our lives. You have without a doubt made it a better place. I am still finding it hard to believe you are turning ten years old.

Despite lockdowns, it’s been a good year for you. You’ve become more comfortable in your own skin. Last year you were diagnosed with autism. And I think it’s helped you and us to truly understand who you are and that’s been a really positive thing. To understand what you need and what makes you happy.

Before Christmas, you got Covid, which sucked, as did spending the Christmas and winter in lockdown. But we made the best of it. You did so well in Ms Balchin’s class in year 4. Growing and getting such a glowing report. I’m really proud of you.

Your guitar is still a very big part of your life and your playing is brilliant. You go to the Rock Project and have guitar lessons. Last year you did a concert to your classmates and you had the best time. People even asked for your autograph afterwards. You came out of school that day absolutely beaming.

This year you have discovered a new love – Warhammer. Painting the models, reading the rules and learning about the lore. You’ve not got to a proper game yet as you’re still creating your army but it will be soon. You’ve asked for lots of Warhammer bits for your birthday, as well as few Minecraft bits, books and cat Lego. There always has to be something cat-related in there!

I made you a Minecraft cake for your birthday and at the weekend you took a couple of friends paddleboarding and then they came back for pizza and cake. On Sunday you had your best friend over so you could both do Warhammer painting and it was a great time.

Your hair is super long now, down past your shoulder blades and you still have your ears pierced. Your favourite clothes are skinny jeans and cool t-shirts with trainers or boots. You love to listen to music and listen to it all of the time. We got you an Alexa for your bedroom last year and I think it might have been one of the best things we got you as you are always listening to different rock bands on it.

You are definitely growing up and some things are just too young for you now. I can’t believe that this time next year we will be deciding which secondary school you will be going to. You’re still going to swimming lessons, but I think that this time next year you won’t be as your swimming is pretty nearly there and you have really grown in confidence. You love going to Gym Ninjas and yoga on a Saturday morning. I think Gym Ninjas is one of your favourite times of the week, along with the Rock Project.

Your best friends are Michael, Conor and Isabelle, and Bella will always have a special place in your heart. When you grow up you want to a guitarist and an artist. You also still have huge plans that have grown year upon year about designing and building your own house. I really, really hope you manage to do that one day. Although I’m not sure by then you will want the shark tank and slides instead of staircases by then. But if you do, well, I can’t wait to see that too.

You love your brother and sister, although you also love a bit of a squabble too. At the moment the age gap between you and Bo seems quite big, and him stealing your toys is tricky. But you are also very sweet with him and will sit down and read him a story too. Aria is your partner in crime and you love playing Minecraft together.

So that’s it. Ten years, where have they gone? Keep on growing, keep being happy, plus don’t forget even when you’re big and cool, you still have to give your Mum hugs.

Love Mummy x